We ArE
by Ciel D'or Serendipite
Summary: "Fuji-Sempai, what are we?" "Are we not lovers?" 1 AM one-shot maybe? Slight angst? (not really though) Warning: Yaoi, Shounen-Ai, blah, ahead. Formerly: WhitewingsFlutter


I made the Icon/picture thing myself :D it's Fuji and Ryoma even though it doesn't look like it. orz

Something to get out the pent-up stress and ughhhhh from school. Inspired by reading 'Logic' by hyperdude and sort of 'Cause You Don't See Me Like I Wish You Would' by Ayingott. Made at 1 AM so it's not very well done. I didn't think it belonged in ThRoSePiCaps so that's why it gets to be by itself.

* * *

"Fuji-senpai…"

"Hmm?"

The bell chimes a little, floating lightly. You can't tell the season from the sky, cloudy slightly, with a sun that hides and comes out on and off occasional winds in the air.

It's both hot and chilly, and as the wind moves the small body on a wooden floor rolls over. A shiver starts but it doesn't really finish, halfheartedly going through but dying out in the middle.

Light brown hair flows with the breeze as well, darker than honey, and yet lighter than chocolate. The expression is strange, something false and not to be trusted. The eyes are seemingly closed but not really, the long eyelashes, peeking out only in the light, subtly hide twinkling blue.

Nevertheless it is somewhere between late summer and early fall. School hasn't started yet but there is nothing to do. Neither of them want to play tennis, the air is somehow stiff between them, none-to-visible but thick enough to cut through.

They simply lie there, waiting for something as if upon agreement.

Gold peers out from under impossibly dark eyelashes. The skin is pale, sometimes seeming translucent but the pallidity enhanced the gold, making it seem impossibly bright.

"What are we?"

The other, just as pale tilted his crown slightly feigning confusion.

"I was rather under the impression we were people, Ryoma-kun."

Warning flashed through the aforementioned 'Ryoma-kun' s' orbs like a dry burning fire.

"Fuji- senpai"

Blue eyes revealed from under their curtain-like color, answering in all seriousness this time.

"Are we not lovers?"

As the words left his lips a sigh left the other's. He turned once again his eyes facing the ceiling of the quiet home.

"Are we?"

The one lying down sat up, clothing ruffled slightly as another quiet breeze came.

They sat in silence both understanding the situation, knowing such a thing would come.

It was a thing that hadn't really had a beginning or an end. Spending time hitting a neon yellow ball back and forth in pointless rallies, eating together simply because they were both hungry and going places by themselves together because it didn't occur for them to do any thing else.

Naturally it started turning into a habit. Something they weren't really conscious of, something that only happened because it did without explanation. And suddenly those simple moments of being there turned into stolen kisses in hidden alleyways, silent groping in locker room showers, touching and feverish bodies. Unconscious 'I love you' s and 'I love you too' s after the afterglow.

How they had somehow ended up there, both on the same court one dull day. The perfect time to finish a game that just as well, never ended. Hot and sweaty and enjoyable and fun and thrilling.

How did something ambiguous as that go on for 4 years, a strange relationship where they dated but not intentionally. Did that count? What was it? They hadn't really dealt with anything. They let things come on their on lost in a haze of heat and want and need, as well as drowsy in the serenity and peace and warmth. No one asked if they were together just assumed, as if it were a given.

It was comforting and relaxed but at the same time suffocating as the heat of American summers. There was nothing clean and sharp and crisp. The words were muddled lines blurred. The actions clashed before fading into uncertainty.

It wasn't the best way to do things but it was all right. Both seemed to be fine with such unclear arrangements, they knew without words. Never was there such a need for confirmation.

So why? Why now after four years?

Ryoma understood, just like always, the unspoken question.

"…I…I'm just tired of the constant haze Syuusuke." Ah, a change of name, a sign of utmost earnestness. The golden eyes faced him dead-on, the smaller man drew closer almost sitting on his lap but not quite. The golden inferno burned brighter.

"We can't just wander around forever, right?"

It was strange, really, for Ryoma the younger boy, quiet and childish at times and extremely cocky and bratty, to be the one that took charge.

Of course, Fuji knew that soon they needed to get themselves together. Fuji was eighteen, college was almost exactly there and Ryoma was still a freshman in high school. There was responsibility when becoming older and things needed to be straightened out, after so many years of aimlessly going.

"Syuusuke! Are we in love? Are we lovers? What is this…?"

Alas, it was all very simple really. Simple to the point of frustration. What did he feel for Ryoma.

He was almost sure he loved him. He loved the lazy smirks and the glint of challenge that would often gather in Golden orbs. He loved that strange sort of childishness that was so unexpected under all those layers of maturity and strength. He loved the small pointless banters, the smart aleck comments, and the somehow catlike nature.

They had their fights but most of the time they were stupid, heated merely by unyielding pride and were solved via passionate make-out sessions.

He faced his confused other, who really was in his lap this time, with a genuine smile.

"Saa….don't worry Ryo-chan. It's really very simple, you know? Just figure it out. What do you feel for me?"

Ryoma frowned slightly. What he felt for Syuusuke Fuji?

He wasn't really sure. Fuji was mysterious with his quiet smiles and knowing glances. It made Ryoma want to chase after him. Want to catch him and figure out what Fuji always seemed to know. Fuji made him feel alive. He brought the unwitting smiles to Ryoma's lips, he made Ryoma's eyes sparkle with challenge and his heart soar with the never ending excitement. Fuji never failed to surprise him and even though sometimes those surprises were embarrassing or unpleasant Ryoma sort of enjoyed them because he never got bored.

He loved it when Fuji smiled at him because it made him feel proud like making Fuji do something real and straightforward was a reward and something only Ryoma could do. He liked how Fuji would tease him but was never deliberately mean. He loved how Fuji would always know what to do when he needed it.

He looked back up towards Fuji's simple smile, at what he didn't know but it was real and beautiful. The ever-blue eyes sparkled with amusement.

"Well? Do you know?"

To be honest Ryoma didn't know. He didn't know what love was, he didn't have an example he could match up with. He liked being with Fuji, there wasn't anyone he knew that could really give him the same feeling.

Whatever. Simple enough.

"Un." He wasn't going to say exactly what he thought. That would be much too embarrassing and sappy for him. Gay or not he was still a man, and he had a man's pride.

He looked away for awhile before looking back to Fuji from the corner of his eyes.

"What about you?"

Fuji grinned.

"I love (torturing) you, of course!"

Ryoma scowled.

"Fuji-senpai!"

"Aww, what happened to 'Syuusuke?"

Ryoma reached out to hit Fuji over the head. Suddenly Fuji grabbed his wrist pulling him even closer than he already was, capturing his lips in a fervent kiss. His tongue licked over Ryoma's teeth briefly before swirling against the roof of his mouth. He explored further around the hot cavern, tongue swirling and dipping into every nook and cranny. When Ryoma snapped out of his initial surprise and pleasure that came immediately after, he replied enthusiastically. They twisted and nipped at each other biting and licking a bit, before Fuji pulled away, slightly out of breath but smirking all the same.

Ryoma's face was flushed bright red, eyes foggy and disoriented. He scowled at seeing his lover's smirk, or tried to anyway but it came out more of a cross between a pout and a frown.

He blushed a little more when Fuji chuckled at his expression.

Ryoma buried his face into Fuji's cream-colored shirt, sighing into the pleasurable warmth.

"Idiot." He smirked slightly.

Fuji just chuckled some more.

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That kiss was hard...and it's really crappy too. Never mind forget it ever happened, I have even more respect for people who write the really well-done Lemons now I can't even write a good kiss scene. =3= Booooo. Please read and REVIEW anyway?


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